I'm sure that the photos of my 50th high school class reunion will
only be of interest to the members of my class, but I am posting them
here to make them available to my classmates for viewing or copying if
they so wish. As I expected, when I first arrived at the reunion I was
somewhat apprehensive. There were only a couple of people that I had
seen in the past 40 years so I did not expect to recognize very many at
all. And I was right. When I first arrived I said to myself, "Who are
all of these old people? Are they classmates or spouses?" Thank
goodness for name tags, for once I knew who someone was I could
immediately see through the many years to find that young face that I
once knew. If you wish to see them, the photos are on a photo page
labeled "CHS Reunion" (bottom of index in the right-hand column).
A lot of old high school memories came back, some of
which I have written about on this blog and some that I had not recalled
for the past 50 years. I find that my memories of high school are
somewhat selective. I remember a lot of the very good and very bad but
not a lot of the in-between. Except for some of those extremes plus
football and track I remember very little of my junior and senior
years. Most of what I do remember is with fondness.
I
have never had what I would consider a very good memory. It became
worse after my return from Vietnam when I began repressing a lot of
memories. I tried going about my life as if Vietnam had never
happened. I didn't think about it much or talk about it and I was
rarely asked about it. I stuffed most of my memories into "my little
black box" that is deep inside of me. This is where unpleasant memories go to stay and it is very difficult to retrieve them.
It's not like I had memories of gore and such. I was in an artillery
unit in a large base camp that was relatively safe. Some have said that
it may have something to with "survivor's guilt". For whatever reason,
I sometimes repress feelings and emotions yet I know how I am
"supposed" to act and when necessary can display the expected
expressions and say the right words.
I would like to write
a book about my army experience and and its resulting effects on my
life but I am having a very difficult time remembering enough to do so.
I started the book 20 years or so ago and I have a fairly decent
outline plus lot of notes that I have managed to extract from my memory
by reading memoirs of other vets and going back over old letters and
photos that I have. Early on, I attended a couple of group sessions for
Vietnam Vets but had to quit because it made me more depressed hearing
them tell of their terrible experiences!
Since Vietnam I
have been in therapy on and off (mostly on) and have been diagnosed as
suffering from moderate to severe clinical depression (working in
management for Abbott Labs in N. Chicago, IL was probably enough by
itself to cause it!). I really do feel pretty good these days,
especially since retiring from Abbott in 1999. Of course the handful of
pills I take every day helps! Better living through chemistry I always
say! Carol Ann may disagree, but I feel that I am able to function and
perform quite well in everyday life. After moving to Nacogdoches, TX
in 2000 I have been working part-time and call-in as a clinical
pharmacist in a local hospital. I have no management duties and it is
the most satisfying work I have ever done. I retired from that job as
of January 1 this year so that we could travel more and for longer
periods of time but I have already begun going back on an occasional
call-in basis to help cover for vacations and such. I enjoy the mental
stimulation and clinical problem-solving of working in an acute care
environment too much to completely let it go.
Enough of my
rambling and disclosures. I promise more upbeat and humorous stories
once we have begun our two month trip to New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada,
and California in August. Meanwhile, you may have to put up with the
occasional piece of drivel.
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